With not even two weeks of preschool behind us, I have heard about a classmate, O, three times. The comments about this little boy are never positive. O hit me with a block. O grabbed the trucks away from me. And today, O pushed me into the slide in the backyard. All of these comments came from Teagan.
Each time she told me about O, I asked her about how she handled it. After one altercation, she told me that she "just walked away". During another, she told him, "I don't like that." She never seemed bothered or upset by it.
While eating lunch today, Teagan told me that O pushed her repeatedly into the slide while they were playing in the yard. The rest of the story is what warmed my heart….
Seeing that her sister was being pushed around, Quinn rushed over, grabbed Teagan's hand and immediately said to O, "that's my sister!" Their friend, X, who has said that Teagan is his best friend, also rushed over and told O, "we don't push." Hand in hand, my girls then "just walked away." And then it was done. The girls then launched into a story about a book that they read in school.
There were a few things that I loved about this…
1. The obvious. Despite all of the fighting they do at home, my girls will stand up for each other when it counts.
2. They handled the situation perfectly, in my opinion. I've tried to teach them to stand up for themselves and say what they want/don't want and to walk away if they feel that they need space.
3. They handled it perfectly without any adult involvement. 4 3-year olds! It was a great reminder to give them a little bit more credit at times.
How have you taught your kids to handle conflict?
Update (September 12th):
When I picked the girls up today, I had to read and sign my first ever incident report. O bit Quinn quite badly on her thigh. After speaking with one of their teachers, it turns out that O speaks very little english. The language barrier is playing a part in his behaviour.