Teagan and Quinn were lucky enough to be born with a built-in best friend. From the day they finally noticed one another, they've entertained each other. Soon enough they started playing together, creating games and getting into trouble. Yes, they fight too. But, at the end of every day, Teagan gets into Quinn's crib and they have a cuddle. They hug, kiss and giggle. We move Teagan into her own crib, which inevitably ends up right next to Quinn's (they pull them together).
While we have had play dates and gone to drop-in centres from the time they were 6 weeks old, they only truly started playing with other kids around their second birthday. Prior to that, they played along side other kids, but that was the extent of it.
The girls are best buddies. Up until recently, they only had eyes for each other. They have always been on a level playing field. They knew where things stood and could count on the other to be there.
We went to the zoo with our friends and their 3-year old daughter. Within minutes of arriving at the zoo, the three girls were out of their strollers running around. "Why don't you grab one of the little girls' hands?" my friend said to her daughter. She was next to Teagan so she reached for her hand. Teagan happily took it and they walked off together. The girls let go of one another's hand to check out the tiger. After we put the kids down, their daughter went for Teagan's hand again. Quinn saw it this time. No TT! She unsuccessfully tried to push Teagan out of the way. Teagan and the 3-year old walked off hand in hand.
Teagan had made a new friend. She clearly loved having an older kid to follow around. Quinn's mood quickly changed. She tried shoving Teagan one more time. I got annoyed with Quinn for trying to hit her sister before I saw what was going on. Each time we checked out a new animal, Quinn went off into the corner. When we stopped at a play area, Teagan and the other girl ran through a tunnel laughing. Quinn went off to the side and rested her head on a rock. She looked sad. She looked like her best friend in the whole world had ditched her for someone new. She was quiet and not herself. Our friends, who hadn't seen the girls in several months, couldn't believe that Quinn was normally the chatty, loud one. After trying to talk to her and cheer her up, it was clear that she didn't have a clue what she was feeling.
Jealously over Mommy's attention is nothing new since they've had to share my attention from day one. Jealously over Teagan's attention was new and confusing. Quinn has never had to share her built-in best friend before. Seeing my youngest baby with hurt feelings was heartbreaking. Maybe because it was the first time. I doubt it gets any easier (Moms of older kids?). I guess I'll learn how to handle it because I know it's only the beginning!
After a few texts with my 'everything twin guru', Eva, I tried make Quinn feel special with one-on-one time. Eva also suggested trying to encourage her to be more independent.
The learning of an important life lesson started yesterday. My babies are growing up! (insert tear!)
|Teagan and her new friend|
|Quinn and Mommy|