Tuesday, September 13, 2011

Feeling Guilty

There are two of them and one of me. Sometimes I feel guilty because I'm constantly having to split my attention between the two of them, when it's just the three of us, that is. I feel guilty because it seems like they are being short-changed. Yes, a second child may feel the same way, but I think it's different.

Teagan tends to be a bit fussier than Quinn, although she's improved a lot over the last month or two. As a result, I feel like I'm having to give more attention to Teagan in order to calm and soothe her. Quinn is so relaxed and happy to just kick away on the play mat. I'll look at her and feel guilty. Part of me wonders if she actually realizes this and fusses to get attention sometimes. Even when both girls are happy, I find myself going back and forth between the two. I sometimes feel like I'm not doing enough with either of them.

I know that this is my issue. I know that my girls aren't hurting for attention or love. Life as twins is all they've known, even though they don't acknowledge each other yet. I worked so hard to be able to tandem feed the girls but actually find myself feeding them individually more often than not. It's nice to have a few moments with each of them.

I think that this is a common worry for parents of twins. I think that many parents of singletons probably feel this way upon the arrival of a second child. I know that I'm certainly not alone! Anyways, my feelings of guilt will subside, I know. I'm doing the best I can with the girls and love our time together, even if I do have to split it between them.


  1. I am sure it's a worry for parents of twins and then also for parents when they have their second LO and honestly I worry about it too. Like when I need to get things done around the house. I feel bad for just letting her sit, even if she is happy and content. The truth is I am pretty sure we all worry about every little detail with our babies because we want the very best for them and are all paraniod even though we are for sure doing our very best. That makes us good Mommas! I think worrying and second guessing just comes with the parenting territory at times.

  2. I don't think either of them is lacking love or attention. They are precious and you and Jenn are doing an excellent job of giving them each what they need. Don't feel guilty for a second. Really.