Thursday, April 26, 2012

The Littlest Bully That Ever Was


This is the face of the spoon thief. Do not be fooled by this adorable, pint-sized 10-month old. Less than 2 minutes before this photo was taken, Teagan was holding both of those spoons.

Quinn has become quite the little bully in recent weeks. It doesn't matter what her sister is playing with, she wants it. She will do anything to get it and almost always wins. She has also been known to hit Teagan when things do not go her way. 

I let them play on their own every day, but I'm always close by. They almost always play close to each other and usually interact quite a bit. I'll often find them under the table giggling at one another. Sometimes one will do something that the other finds hilarious and then do it repeatedly. But, sometimes I look over to see Quinn grabbing a toy from Teagan's hands, which usually results in tears. Most recently, Teagan has started crying when Quinn gets close to her. I don't think Quinn is intentionally trying to hurt her, but I think that that's how Teagan sees it. 

I do my best to find a happy medium between stepping in and letting them settle it on their own. I don't want to always be coming to Teagan's rescue, but at the same time, I don't want Quinn to think that taking something from her sister is ok. I doubt she understands when I tell her that she can't take the toy that Teagan was playing with, but I figure it's worth starting these lessons early. Teagan can also be a bit of a drama queen. She can really turn it on. I've gotten pretty good at discerning her cries. 

Quinn is almost always the smallest of her playmates. Other moms will tell their children to be careful when playing around little Miss Q. I laugh because she'll play tug-o-war with baby twice her size and often win. She's incredibly strong for such a little thing. She's also very determined. 

How do you deal with battles over toys or your child hitting others?

6 comments:

  1. I just wanted to say that your girls are adorable and have awesome names. On a side note, we must have very similar taste because I have 3 daughters whose names are Riley, Teagan and Finley (Finn)! Crazy huh?? My Finn is a big bully too (she is 12 months old) and can easily make her 4 year old sister cry.
    -Sarah

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    1. Thanks for the comment Sarah! I can't believe the names! Finn's full name is actually Finley as well. Now you just need another child or dog names Quinn!

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  2. When our son was just a little older than your girls, we started dealing with this issue with the slightly older little boy he spends the day with. We started enforcing the "two hands, two toys" rule so they wouldn't steal from each other just to hoard things. We also started helping the stealie keep the toy while reminding the other that you don't take toys out of another person's hands. After stopping the stealing, we set the timer for when they have to trade(usually 30 seconds or a minute). That worked surprisingly quickly, even at such a young age and it turned into a fun game.

    Kelly

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    1. That's a great idea. Once the girls are little older, I will definitely try the timer. "Two hands, two toys" is a great one too -- I find that Quinn will take one toy after another, just so Teagan won't have one.

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  3. Not to alarm you, but that face screams "Give me your milk money and no one gets hurt..." Haha! Adorable nonetheless :)

    My best friend is a twin and she mentions fairly often that the biggest downfall to being a twin is the expectation of sharing EVERYTHING from the time her and her sister were infants. Although it is impossible to always have two of everything available for the next 18 years or so, I would try to make sure Quinn and Teagan learn early that some things are going to be shared and others are simply not. Sharing encouraged but not mandated. Good luck!

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    1. It totally does! -- I hope that she's not going to be that little bully who steals other kids lunches! She LOVES to eat afterall!

      I definitely do not plan on buying two of everything. I think that they get grouped together enough. It will be important for them to grow as individuals as well. I like that - 'sharing is encouraged but not mandated.'

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